Sunday, July 11
After yesterday's conversation at Kim and Bennett's, I decided to take this thing one day at a time. Tomorrow will be soon enough to look into the future. So today, Don and walked down to the Farmer's Market, bought breakfast there and fixings for lunch and dinner, then did household chores in a relaxed and unhurried way. Late in the afternoon, before going to John's birthday party, we were lying in bed, me reading a book and Don working on his poetry. I said, "This is the perfect Sunday afternoon for me." Don said, "Me, too."

Monday, July 12
The alarm, which I had carefully set for 7:05, did not go off. Or rather, it did, but since it was set on Radio and not on Alarm, and since Don had de-tuned the radio so it was between stations, it made no sound. I awoke with a start at 7:50. We dashed around to get ready to leave. Actually, I dashed around. Don took his time, making yogurt with blueberries, sliced banana, and protein powder. I couldn't understand why he wasn't in as big a panic as I was. I finally took the bowl away from him and put it in the car. It was the only way I could get him to leave.

We left at 8:10, phoning ahead to Dr. Prados's office to tell them we'd be late. We arrived at 9:15. After filling out a few "I agree to pay for this" forms, we sat down in the waiting room. And waited. And waited. All that rushing around I did this morning was for nothing. The doctor was not ready to see us at 9:00, or at 9:30. I told Don, "I'm glad they scheduled in this little space for us to worry in. I don't think I would be in the proper state of anxiety without it."

At about this time, we overhear Dan, the receptionist, talking to someone on the phone in the office across the hall. "Oh, don't bother," he was saying, "let us worry about that for you."

"See?" Don said. "they can do the worrying for you."

"Great."

We also overhear Dan saying, "Oh, hello Dr. Prados. Your nine o'clock is here." Then he turns his back on us and we don't hear the rest of the conversation. I roll my eyes heavenwards. 9:30 and the doctor is just now being informed that we've arrived.


Notes from the meeting with Dr. Prados, UCSF Neuro-oncologist.

Dr. Prados: The diagnosis is grade 4 glioblastoma multiforme, which is a malignant tumor, a cancer. The grades indicate how rapidly and agressively it's growing. Grade 4 is the most rapidly growing grade. Survival depends on response to treatment. Radiation is the most common treatment following surgery. Most patients under 55 also get chemotherapy, but the magnitude of improved outcome is measured in months. In short, the amount of time gained is offset by the degredation in quality of life due to the toxicity of the chemo.

Don: Are there any curative courses of treatment?

P: No, it is not a curable condition. 50% of those diagnosed with this grade of glioblastoma multiforme live one year; 20% live two years; 5% live five years. Treatment can double or triple life expectancy. If there's growth during radiation, then expectation is poor. In 20% of the cases, the tumor is smaller after radiation. If the tumor is the same or smaller, you would have an average life expectancy. It is unusual to be alive and well after five years. The best predictor is how you feel and how the tumor looks in two to three months.

D: Are there any promising experimental treatments?

P: Yes, if initial therapies don't work. For example, treating the tumor with stuff we put directly into the tumor through a shunt.

D: What about Burzynski's work?

P: As I understand it, that's only available on-site at his clinic, in Houston.

D: I want you to be aware of my interest in doing that, so you know I'm interested.

P: Yes, I understand. So long as alternative or experimental approaches are used subsequent to initial therapies, not in place of them.

D: What proves ultimately fatal in this disease?

P: The tumor exerts pressure on the brain stem, which controls breathing and heart rate. The pressure eventually leads to coma, and the coma to death.

D: Is the progression painful?

P: That's unlikely. More typically, there is increased lethargy, in which you spend more and more time sleeping. From there, you slip into a semi-coma, followed by one or two days of unconsciousness.

At that point, Dr. Prados showed us the MRI taken before and after the surgery. The shots taken before show the tumor taking up almost all of the right side of Don's brain. They also clearly show the brain stem being forced to one side. The shots afterwards are even more remarkable. Most of what was a bright mass in the earlier shots is now a clear, dark region, almost like a placid lake. The brain stems seems to be nearly back to its normal position. It appears to be an amazing surgery - amazingly thorough, and amazing that so much could be removed from a man's skull without killing him. However, there are still bright fringes near the inner arc of where the tumor was, indicating cancerous cells still rest deep in Don's brain.

Don: So, without the surgical intervention, the tumor would have been lethal.

Prados: Yes. Fairly soon.

D: Is there anything particular about the long-term survivors?

P: Just that they're younger and treatment was aggressive.

D: What are the side effects of radiation?

P: Reddened skin, tiredness, dry mouth, fluid in the middle ear. Research indicates that Thalidomide with radiation may be promising. Thalidomide is an angiogenesis inhibitor.

Lou: So, we'll starve the cells as well as zap them?

P: Yes.

D: If the tumor gets that large again, what then? Surgery again?

P: There are lots of options.

D: But most result in "buying time."

P: Yes. But it's what kind of time that counts. It may be buying time with toxicity, or buying time that's spectacularly good time.

D: Is a hemorrhage unusual for tumors of this sort?

P: Yes.

That pretty much ended the interview, question-and-answer period. After determining that we wanted to have the radiation done at Stanford, he gave us the name of the neuro-oncologist there, Dr. Kendra Peterson, and said to call them tomorrow to set up an intake interview and a therapy schedule. Then he shook our hands and left.

Tuesday, July 13
Jim came for a visit and we all went out to dinner. I left early to go to chorus rehearsal. During rehearsal, I begin to feel short of breath and dizzy. At break, I consider going home, but decide to sit it out. As we leave, I pick up a six-pack of Seven-Up left over from the chorus retreat. I have never told Don that I decided to skip the retreat, even though the chorus had given me a scholarship so I could attend and Steve was willing to offer Don special accomodations.

When I get home, Don and I have a discussion about his going to San Francisco and Oakland by himself on the train. I tell him, "I don't think you're ready yet. I think you're too vulnerable, and I worry about your being mugged by someone who would take advantage of your distraction and confusion." Don takes this very calmly. We have to cut the conversation short as I suddenly need to use the bathroom. I have a bout of diarrhea.

I spend a miserable night with chills shaking my body and pain in my stomach. I take one of Don's Zantec but it doesn't help. Sometime between midnight and three AM I throw up. I make quite a mess in the bedroom, hallway, and bathroom. I have to yell for help. Don and Steve both wake up, and Don takes on the tast of cleaning up after me.

Wednesday, July 14
I vomit and have diarrhea several times during the night, ending with two wrenching bouts of dry heaves. After the last of these, I take one of the Seven-Ups out of the fridge and pour some into a glass. Then I stir it to make it go flat and take a sip. It feels good, but I drink only a few sips. I don't want to push it.

On my way back from the kitchen, I notice that Don left the back door open after he cleaned up the hallway. I close it and take my flat Seven-Up with me back to bed.

In the morning, Steve drives Don and me to the Palo Alto Medical Foundation, where Don pushes me through the halls in a wheelchair on my way to a doctor's appointment. "Quite a turn-around, isn't it?" I say.

"I'll drive," Don says. "You yell out warnings."

"Field cut! Coming through!" I yell. People scatter. "I guess this teaches me for telling you you're not ready to take care of yourself."

Dr. Whistler, who is standing in for Dr. Lane (again; I'm beginning to call him The Invisible Doctor), diagnoses acute food poisoning. He tells Don what I can and cannot eat for the next few days. Looks like Don will be cooking and caring for me until Friday. At the end of the examination, Dr. Whistler asks if there is anything else.

"Yes," I say. "I've been trying to get ahold of Dr. Lane since January to ask him this. I guess you know that my home situation is stressful," I take Don's hand so he doesn't feel like I'm blaming him, "and I have a history of not dealing with stress very well. I also have a history of dysthymia. So I was wondering if you or Dr. Lane could recommend a therapist I could see."

Dr. Whistler says he will speak to the psychiatry offices. He says I should call them later today or tomorrow and set up an intake interview.

Steve returns and takes us shopping for my dietary supplies: clear juices and some light-weight vegetables for steaming and some crackers. Don does all the shopping himself.

Don takes care of me for the next two days: cooking my meals, doing the laundry, peeking in on me in bed nearly every two hours. Waz calls when he's out of the house at one time and tells me he thinks Don makes "a good head nurse." When I tell Don this, he appears to take offense. Later, he says he supposes Waz meant a pun on the word "head."

Thursday, July 15
When I mention to Don that he left the back door open the other night, he says, "I guess I assumed Steve was still up." This sounds like a classic right-brain non-sequitor to me.

Friday, July 16
I'm well enough to go to work. Annie comes down for a visit. Though I don't get to see her, she does get to see the house and finds it charming. She and Don have lunch in downtown Mountain View while I have lunch at home. Curtis calls while I'm there to ask if Don is available. I tell him to try again tonight, but he doesn't.

Saturday, July 17
We do the Saturday morning fun run and coffee, then return to Oakland. That evening, Don says, "Even with you here, this feels less like home than Mountain View."



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© 2000 Louis Flint Ceci / ceci@best.com